Just Another Starving Artist

It sounds like I’m expecting a lot of the world by demanding an entire birthday week, right? But, that’s just how it happened. My birthday was last week (April 14th, a Wednesday and the day before tax day) and somehow it got spread out over a whole week! It sounds super fun right? It was, but it was also pretty stressful.

I worked my normal schedule all week, and the weekend before my birthday I celebrated with my parents because my dad can only come up on weekends (he lives in New Jersey, and yes, my parents are still married, he spends quite a bit of time in Maine with us). So, Saturday night I went out to dinner with my family at this restaurant that I love in Lewiston, it’s called Fuel and they have amazing food and the best cheese fondue in the world!! I ended up eating waaay too much and by the time we left, not only could I not button my pants, but I was in PAIN. I thought my stomach was tearing apart inside of me, but I managed to grin and bear it while we went to my mom’s friend’s house so he could show me some Haitian art. It was worth it too!! Haitian Voodoo flags are absolutely amazing! They are all hand beaded and sequined, and I love sparkly things.

On Sunday we had a party with my grandmother because her birthday is two days before mine. My whole family (including my sister’s boyfriend and his daughter) was there. We gathered at my grandmother’s apartment and opened presents. I got some new dresses to wear to work, a robot bug, a Portland trails map (for bike riding) and some money to put towards a new cell phone. Then we went out to eat at a restaurant in the tiny town where my mom lives. We were the only people there and it was so much fun and the food was delicious.

Monday and Tuesday I did a lot of house cleaning and recipe gathering for the big party I was throwing myself on Friday night. I was downloading a lot of music too because I got some Itunes giftcards for my birthday.

Wednesday was my actual birthday and I worked. While I was at work I actually got a call from the pastry chef at that suepr awesome job I’d applied for, telling me I didn’t get it. It was ok though because I’d already kind of figured that out and she was so nice about it and she talked to me for a few minutes and said she really liked me and thought I would be good in a pastry position but I just needed more experience and that I should volunteer my time at some local restaurants. It was really nice of her to call and talk to me and I really appreciated it, It didn’t even drop my good mood an inch on my birthday. It was also a really nice day on Wednesday and the cherry blossoms outside of my work were shedding light pink petals, it was beautiful. The cafe I work at is next to a playground so a few times a day preschool classes march by in little lines and everytime they did, they would stop and play in the petals. The teachers would throw the petals in the air and the little tiny kids would dance around as they fell down. It was so so so cute. Later in the afternoon there was a man in a black suit with a black turtle neck, black combed over and gelled hair, and black sunglasses standing outside smoking a cigarette. I thought he looked kind of like a spy and he was standing between the two flowering trees and all of these tiny pink flower petals were swirling around him, It was surreal. After work my Mom picked me up and took me to the cell phone store so I could get my new phone. I got a droid, which is pretty exciting. When I got home my boyfriend made me a special birthday dinner and then we went out and got some drinks.

Thursday I made 4 dozen cupcakes and prepped some of the other party food, did some last minute cleaning, and tried to learn how to use my new cell phone,

Friday I went to work, realized that in my efforts to learn my new cell phone I’d accidentally deleted all of my phone numbers and people would be calling me about the party! So, after work I went back to the cell phone store and they put all of my contacts back into my phone (Thanks Verizon!!). As soon as I got home I jumped right into party prep mode. making 3 dozen more cupcakes, setting out food platters, blowing up balloons, etc. A few of my friends came early and helped out by cutting veggies while I put on my party dress and then gradually other people started filtering in. Sadly, not everyone who said they were coming to my “huge birthday party” showed up, and it ended up being only about 20 people. I made way too much food. But, I had fun and I think everyone else did too. The people who’d never been to my apartment said they really liked it and everyone seemed to like my dress- which I made.

Saturday I had to work at 8:45 in the morning!! I was so exhausted and out of it (not from drinking either because I didn’t drink at all), I was miserable at work. The 6 hour shift seemed to drag on forever. When I got home I went straight to bed and slept for about 3 hours and then woke up and I was sick! Just in general, everything about me felt ill. I spent the night laying on the couch knitting and headed to be at around 2am.

Today I worked at 8:45am again, but I was feeling much better. Unfortunately there were no customers so I got sent home early and now here I am, writing this asking myself that eternal question: Should I nap, or should I knit?

Wow, I haven’t posted in a while. And the reason is a bad one. I finished another knitting project and I wanted to post a picture of it and I haven’t gotten around to taking one.  But, I did finish one and maybe someday I’ll post a picture.

Work has been going pretty smoothly. I seem to be getting used to it finally- even though sometimes my boss still thinks I don’t know what I’m doing…

Last week I had a big exciting thing! I got to go into the super awesome restaurant where I applied to be a pastry assistant and do a stage (shadow)! I went in on Thursday and worked in the prep kitchen a bit and it was so scary! I had never been there before and I had no idea what I was doing, I felt totally lost. But I still had so much fun baking in a real baking kitchen! I was supposed to move upstairs to the upstairs kitchen after that but they were going to have a really slow night so they sent me home and told me to come back on Saturday night. So, on Saturday I had a really busy day, I worked at the cafe from 8:45am until 3pm and then I went to the restaurant from 5pm till 8pm. It was A LOT of standing and my legs still haven’t fully recovered! I had so much fun though, I really loved it. Plating was so fun and interesting. You get elements (delicious elements like cake and ice cream and chocolate sauce and brittle) and the you have a design you make with them, and you try to do it really fast, but perfectly. And working in a big raised-exposed kitchen was really really exciting, it was like being on stage! I really hope they liked me but I am really inexperienced so I’m trying not to get my hopes up.

I guess that’s all for now.

Alright, so I’ve been making progress in…life. When I started working at my job my name became an immediate concern. There are only about 7 employees at my job, 5 girls in the front of the house, and a boy and a girl in the kitchen. My name is the same name as the girl in the kitchen which occasionally causes some problems. When the male cook calls out my name for something she frequently answers, and likewise, when I’m in the kitchen and he says something to her I assume he’s talking to me. So, they’d been asking me if I had any nicknames they could call me, but I really don’t. Finally, about a week and a half ago I suggested to the kitchen crew that they might call me Captain Awesome. That way if I were at the counter and had an order come up they would shout “Captain Awesome please!!” Unfortunately it didn’t take. On Sunday however, magic happened when the male cook called out one of the other waitress’ names and I asked if he’d called for me. He said no, it didn’t even sound like my name, and I said it kind of did (it did not…at all) and he said “What are you talking about? That doesn’t sound anything like Captain Awesome”

A little bit later I had some customers at the counter and when their order came up my dreams came true. I heard him shout, clear as day “CAPTAIN AWESOME PLEASE!!” It made my week. It happened two more times that day, and has yet to happen again but I have high hopes.

On Tuesday I was browsing on Craigslist (out of habit at this point – I have a part-time job that I love and my summer job will be starting in just a couple of weeks). I stumbled upon an ad for a “Pastry Assistant” the job is for a full time position at a busy in-town restaurant starting at the end of April. I thought it sounded kind of like a job I’d applied for in August, and followed up with in-person to meet the acting pastry chef, but did not get. I almost didn’t send in my application to avoid the embarrassment of them saying “We didn’t hire you last time, what makes you think we want you now?” But really, I wasn’t completely sure it was the same restaurant and even if it was, what harm could it do? So I sent in my resume, highlighting the commissioned cakes and chocolates I’ve made, since that is what the position is for. The next morning I had an e-mail from the woman at the restaurant I’d thought it was. She said she remembered me from when I’d applied in August and she was excited that I was still interested, and said that I’d left a “good impression”! She asked if I would be interested in coming in at the begining of April to work a shift in the kitchen with her and the chef to see how I liked it, how I did, and how I fit in – everything like that. Yes, yes and YES!

If, by some miracle, I get this job it would make my LIFE!! I could most likely still work my current job since my hours there are 10:30am-4pm on 2 days and 8:45am-3pm on 2 others and this new position would be  from 3pm-11pm (only overlapping on one of my 4-o-clock days). It would be tight but I think I could make it happen. I’m getting ahead of myself, because honestly, I don’t think I will get the job but it would just be so awesome if I did!

So that was exciting, I’d also gotten an e-mail that I was still being considered for another job I’d applied for a while back, which would TOTALLY conflict with my current job. But, I got another e-mail from them today that I was no longer in the running. Which is fine by me, because I would hate to have to leave the job I have now. Although it would have been a really cool job.

Today, I deposited my pay-check and tips, so I can pay some bills, and I went to the consignment shop and I got a check from them for $65. Woohoo!!! So I went out for sushi (maki…ok, cucumber roll, whatever) for lunch.

And tonight I made apple pie for the first time and it was so yummy! I also made dinner: bow tie pasta with chicken, basil pesto and goat cheese. And I made granola (a whole pound to last me about a week and a half). I was pretty domestic tonight and it felt good, aside from the burn I got on my hand. Oopsies, that’s what I get for trying to scrape apple-pie-filling off the bottom of the oven while it’s still on/hot.

And last but not least I finished my first pair of arm warmers!!

Not bad, eh? I’ve already started on a new pair. With a different pattern, the age old knit-one purl-two. It’s hard but hopefully worth it. It’s always good to try new things.

Wow, I’ve really been falling behind on the blogging.

It’s most likely because when I work I don’t sleep much so I’m exponentially tired all the time. I just got home from work and I’m dead on my feet. 4 hours of sleep and 5 hour shift will do that to you. Work is going well, nothing major to report. Other than potentially hitting a customer with a high chair the other day…

Ok, so it’s a decent story.

It was really bustling the other day at work (I forget which day because my lack of sleep at night and my propensity for naps have made all of the days seem to blur together into one homogenized clump of week). I was hostessing and a young couple came in a with a baby (pre-toddler, post infant) and asked for a highchair. I seated them in the back corner booth because it was the only one open and then I went to get the highchair. I was moving at a super-human pace because it was so busy and all I could think about was other tables that needed to be bussed so I could seat people and not have to stress about having “a wait”. So anyway, I get the highchair and I’m practically running through the restaurant to bring it to them and all of a sudden BAM!! I smash the highchair into the back of a booth. Right on the edge where a nice man with grey hair was sitting. It wasn’t a little bump either, I was moving so fast and I just plowed right into the booth making a huge noise and the highchair smashed into me and bruised my knee and everyone, I mean EVERYONE stopped talking and looked over at me. I apologized to the man, I don’t think I hit him, I surely hope not at least, and brought the highchair to it’s destination. When I got to the couple with the child they looked at me, almost apologetically- as if my clumsiness were their fault somehow- so I felt I needed to explain somehow. All I could come up with was “It’s just one of those days” I sounded like some jaded veteran waitress!! The crazy thing is, it wasn’t even “one of those days” the day was going fine! But my statement seemed to appease them, they nodded and said “oh really?” and I left.

So that was my first experience with accidentally assaulting a customer.

Oh! Today at work a woman took of my shoe! Not a woman I know or have ever seen before even. Just a woman who came in for breakfast and sat at a booth by herself. I was setting her silverware and menu down and she asked me if my shoes were a certain brand or some other (she named two brands but I don’t remember either of them) and I said I didn’t know and I lifted up my foot to show off the shoe. She asked again what brand it was and I said I didn’t know but I got them at DSW and then I looked at the bottom of the shoe. It seemed right at the time, like the only thing I could really do to move to conversation forward was to look at the bottom of my shoe because we had both stopped talking but she was still looking at my foot. So, I’m standing there, leaning on her booth with my one foot propped up upside-down thinking she would see that the brand written on my shoe was not something she recognized and then I would leave. That was not how it played out. She looked. Couldn’t read it. Touched my shoe. I moved my hand to my foot to better twist it so she could read it, and then she said it. “Can I…Can I take your shoe off and look?” The only proper response is yes, and I said yes without even thinking twice and before I knew it she’d slipped my shoe off of my foot and was reading the bottom of it. Suddenly I realized what was happening. I was not in an invisible bubble, I was standing at the front of a food-establishment on one foot with some strange woman holding my shoe. And then it occurred to me I didn’t know what the next step was. She started to put my shoe down and I didn’t know if she was going to put it back ON me, like Cinderella, or put it on the floor for me to guide my own foot into. We did sort of an awkward move about it, like when you go to hug someone but they go to shake your hand instead and then you put your hand out to shake and they make a move to hug you, it was like that except with someone potentially putting my shoe on for me. Eventually she set it on the ground and I put my foot in it and told her to enjoy her meal. I didn’t even mention it for almost an hour because I’d  convinced myself it probably wasn’t that weird and I was just thinking too much about it. But, when I did mention it the waitresses I was working with thought it was very strange. We had a laugh about it. No offense to the customer at all either! She is a very nice lady and apparently goes into the cafe often and I was AT LEAST as awkward, probably more-so, than she was. It’s just something silly that happened.

Oh, and here’s what all the fuss was about. Not even anything fancy, I know.

Yesterday was a mess!! I woke up super sleepy and had to get ready and run to work. I was hoping to talk to my boss about my potential internship but I didn’t get a chance to before she left. There were only three of us working and I think we were all having “one of those days” just being sluggish and somewhat out-of-it. The shift started off painfully slow. No one came in at all for almost an hour. Luckily I’d purchased a book of word searches to do on just such an occasion. And then, randomly, people started streaming in the door. I couldn’t seat them fast enough! I am the hostess/bus person/ counter staff so I was trying to seat people and get coffee for the take-out customers and it was all happening so quickly! The waitress kept asking me to make her coffee-drinks for her (which is my job) but I just didn’t have time with getting call-in orders and walk-in orders and having to seat people and bus!

And then it happened. I mixed up a to-go order. I still feel really bad about it.

I got a call-in for two tuscan grills (one of my favorite sandwiches, sauteed mushrooms, roasted red peppers, basil pesto, and goat cheese on grilled bread) *no meat*. So, I wrote the order down and brought it to the kitchen and ran back out to the dining room to take care of other customers (by this time I had a line for coffee/to-go orders). I made a few coffees and then this guy came up and ordered two tuscan grills to go, one with chicken and one with bacon (adding meat adds money to the bill). He then changed the order to one tuscan with bacon and one half tuscan with chicken and a cup of soup. I asked him if that would be all and he said yes, so I brought the slip to the kitchen. And then while I was ringing him up he added a diet coke to the order and paid. I made a few more coffees after that and then I went to get his soup to-go all set up. While I was in the kitchen the cook said “Your two tuscans are up” so I grabbed the boxes and gave them to him and he left. I was making some tea for some of the seated patrons when he came back in and said “Diet coke?” to which I replied “two bucks” and he said “I paid for one” and I had forgotten and said “I don’t think so, you didn’t want a drink” and he said “Yes, I’m pretty sure I paid for a diet coke.” and I remembered he had and got him the diet coke, apologized and reminded him that he’d also forgotten his soup. He took the soup and the soda and left again.

The next person who walked up to the register said she’d ordered two tucans *no meat* and suddenly it struck me. I’d messed up. I ran to the kitchen and asked which two tuscans had just gone out…the ones with no meat. And since the cook had already started making the next two with meat she was going to have to start all over. So, I went back down and rang the lady up and told her it was going to be a few more minutes. I started helping other customers and after about 5 minutes the call-in lady said “Can you check if my sandwiches are ready? It’s been a REALLY long time” I ran back up to the kitchen just as her food was being boxed up and I brought it down to her. I wanted to explain why it had taken so long, that it was my fault and not the kitchen being slow, but she ran out too quickly.

Then the phone rang. I didn’t take the call but I knew what it was. I heard the waitress saying “Bacon? Chicken? Ok, yes. We’re sorry. We’ll have that ready for you.” and she brought a slip into the kitchen. I went to find out what was going on and the cook said she was just making up a side of bacon and chicken for them to pick up. I felt so low. One tiny mistake and everyone working had to pay for it. A few minutes later a young woman came in and said “I’m here to pick up something because you screwed up my husband’s order?!” I went and got her the food and gave it to her, apologized and once again was going to explain that it had been my mistake, but she ran out.

A little while later my sister’s former landlord (slumlord) came in with a guy in his 20′s and they sat at the counter. **a few years ago I almost moved into the building this landlord owns, and he told me I had first dibs on the apartment since my sister was such a good tenant. But, when I called 5 hours later to say I wanted the place he told me he’d already rented it out. So that’s my history with him.** Since they were sitting at the counter I was their waitress so I asked if they wanted anything and the landlord, without looking at me, said he didn’t but the guy he was with might. The guy said he wanted a small coffee to go, So I made that and handed it to him and said “Could I get you guys anything else?” and the landlord, still without looking at me, said “Oh, I suppose you want some money from me?” I walked over to the register and rang him up and, still without looking at me, he held $2 out in front of him. So, I walked back around and took his money and walked back to the register, made up his change and walked it back over to him. He took the change, without looking at me, mumbled something to  the guy he was with and they walked out. The whole encounter just seemed very rude to me, and I’m not expecting him to remember me from 4 years ago when I almost rented from him, but I think it’s very strange not to look at your server at all. Very rude.

The rest of the day went pretty smoothly. The rush had died down, so it was mostly bussing tables and seating a few stragglers. I still love my job, I still love the girls I work with, and even on a bad day I consider myself so fortunate to be employed there.

After work on Wednesdays I usually get together with one of my friends to watch The Secret Life of The American Teenager. It’s a really awful show but we love it. I called him (the friend) when I got out of work and he said he wanted to play his new guitar but he would come over at 6:30 and I thought “Great! I’ll nap!” So I napped and he text messaged me at 6:30 and said he’d either come over at 8 or on Saturday. So I kept sleeping. I didn’t wake up until almost 8:30!! It was the longest nap ever! And when I did get up I was so lazy and apparently so was my friend so we rescheduled for Saturday afternoon.

Then I had to eat and get ready to go out to a bar where one of my friends was DJing. I ended up doing nothing for a really long time and didn’t even get to the bar until almost 11pm. It was good to be out and see people. It was my sister’s boyfriend’s birthday and he was there so I got to wish him a happy birthday, and my friend who I went to see said he’d teach me how to use photoshop (finally!) I had an espresso martini and it was so yummy, It tasted like a coffee milkshake! I stayed out until the bar closed at 1am and then headed home, where I talked to my west-coast friend online for a while and then I worked out and showered and didn’t get to bed until after 5am. I really need to work on my sleep schedule..

I lead a crazy, albeit not-very-exciting, life.

Things are still going really well! I still love my job, I think I’m starting to get the hang of it and fit in with the other girls who work there. They (the girls) have been telling me I’m doing really well, and I can’t even tell you how nice it is to hear that!

I’m going to try to start eating better and being healthier in general. That means no more nachos at 2am, really cutting back on nachos all together. I’m going to try to replace Cheetos with baby carrots because they kind of look the same. I’m going to start drinking more water and less soda and eat a banana every day. I made dinner tonight, which I never do because I don’t really like cooking. I made bow tie pasta with chicken and goat cheese and basil pesto. It was delicious. Tomorrow I’m going to try to make granola so I can start eating that too! I’m also going to try to start working out daily or at least every other day.

Today was the first day that I went to my new knitting circle and it was AMAZING! I learned how to knit in the round, purl, and un-knit stitches! I love it! I’m making some wrist-warmers. Check it out.

It may not look like much but it’s a pretty big deal to me, it’s all new things that I didn’t know how to do before and it’s with FOUR needles! That’s a lot! I’m so excited and I can’t wait to finish. This knitting circle is opening whole new worlds of  stitchery to me!

I’m an employee! Today was my first real day of work (non-training) and I think I did pretty well! I did accidentally get there a half hour early though. I’m kinda sad about it because I really would have enjoyed the extra 15 minutes of sleep. I got told I have another shift though, which made me SUPER happy. I’ll now be working 4 days a week. I really do love working there. Today my boss was there all morning and it was pretty slow so she was showing me some tricks about the register and how to properly hold a tray (for when I “start waitressing”!!). After work my friends came over and I had a social afternoon/evening watching bad TV shows and movies. It was really fun. I think I also signed up to be in a knitting circle which will be social AND art. I need both of those in my life right now.

I’m just so happy right now. Friends, job, food, what more could a girl want? Well, I really need to start working on some art again. I’m thinking of expanding my gimp (plastic lanyard) knotting-project into a bikini..perhaps, only time will tell.

My next challenge is telling my boss that I have an internship coming up. My friend who works with me thinks it will be no big deal, but I feel pretty awful asking to take at least a week off of work when I’ve just been hired! I think it may work to my favor that my boss is also an artist and (hopefully) will see that this is a really fantastic opportunity for me. Of course if it comes down to me having to choose between keeping my job and doing the internship, I will choose to keep my job.

Here’s to hoping that things stay AWESOME!

I’m pretty sure I do, I’m pretty sure I love it. Granted, I’ve only been there two days, but it’s so much fun! I’m so happy now that I have a job and the atmosphere in the cafe is just so happy and pleasant. Yesterday was kind of challenging because it was my first day and I didn’t know how to do anything at all. I mean, I’m working at a cafe and I have no waitressing or barista experience. I’m so lucky that I have a good friend working there and training me because I’m not nervous about asking her tons of questions about how to do things.

I’ve been making coffees, seating people, ringing people up, and bussing tables – it might not sound like much but I love it! The cafe has big picture windows right across from the counter (where I stand most of the day) and it’s been sunny out and there’s a bunch of colored balloons stuck high up in a tree across the street and it makes me smile. Even though it’s bad for the environment it’s so pretty, it looks like a painting or a photograph.

I wear my little apron and make small talk with the customers and refill their coffees. I feel like a real waitress, or a fake one, the glamorized kind from movies. It is like a movie, it doesn’t seem real. The other girls who work there are all so nice and interesting and helpful, and the food is DELICIOUS! I’m actually starting to get the hang of things already which is nice. I can’t wait until spring, when it’s sunny out and more people come in.

The only thing is, I’m kind of sad that when I’m done with my training this week I’ll only be working three shifts a week. I want to be there so much more than that! It’s also nice to be making money again, I can’t even tell you how good that feels. And to wake up with a purpose each morning, rather than waking up mid-afternoon and thinking “How will I pass the time until I go to bed again?”

Other than working I have been obsessively making candy (post-Valentine’s Day candy, because I couldn’t motivate to get it done in time for the actual holiday). I’m using the term “obsessive” loosely too. I have made quite a bit of candy, but in reality I spend a lot more time thinking about making it than actually getting it done. Like right now, for instance, I should be coating caramels with chocolate, but I’m here, writing. I want to get a lot done tonight so I can bring some in for the girls at work tomorrow.

Yay for work and yay for candy!

I had two interviews today.  The first one was at a salon and I had never been there before but it was really cool and the people were very nice. I think the interview went well but it’s so hard to tell. I hope they liked me! Then I came home and rested for about an hour before I went to my second interview at the cafe up the street and they hired me!! I’m so excited, I start my training tomorrow and I’ll get to work with my friend! I went out and bought my apron right after the interview because I was so excited. I really hope I’m good at this job, it seems like it will be really fun. It’s very part time though so I’m still looking for more work (potential employers: don’t count me out!!)

I can’t tell if contemporary art is getting better of if my tastes have changed (matured???). When I was first attending art school way back in 04 I would look at the contemporary art (fiber art, sculpture, and painting) and it all seemed terribly bland and pretentious. But, when I got my most recent issue of Fiber Arts magazine in the mail I realized that I liked almost everything in it! Hopefully this means that art is becoming more exciting and not just that I have become accustomed to that which is bland and un-understandable. I don’t think I’m pretentious. At least I hope I’m not!

I still love to go to galleries and hear people talk about art. My personal favorite was at an opening in Manhattan right around this time last year. The show was of yarn strung up in large (wall-size) single-strand frames about 5 inches from the wall, extending from floor to ceiling. I was bored and it was crowded and everyone there seemed to perfectly embody the stereotype of who you might expect to see at some modern art opening. As I was making my way through the crowd I heard a man, in his late 20′s, say to a girl “It really makes you aware of your own three-dimensionality”. Really, he said that.  I laughed out loud, I don’t think he heard me though, which is good.

This is why I’m no good at going to galleries. That and I get bored easily. Although, If this month’s issue of Fiber Arts is in anyway indicative of how the face of contemporary art is changing then I very well could start enjoying galleries much much more!

**Upon reviewing this entry I did come off sounding a bit pretentious. so I guess that’s my answer.**